50 reasons to reject evolution

This appears to be a fairly thorough listing of every argument I've ever heard used. Highlights include:

2.) Because I’m too stupid and/or lazy to open a fucking book or turn on the Discovery Science Channel.

11.) Because I think the word “theory” actually means “random stabs in the dark” when it really means: a large body of facts describing certain phenomena i.e. atomic theory, gravitational theory, germ theory, cell theory, etc.

17.) Because I’m 100% correct about everything 100% of the time and there is 0% chance that some snooty Oxford educated scientist with numerous honorary doctorates could possibly know something that I don’t.

23.) Because the idea that life evolved naturally over billions of years is infinitely less believable than the idea that an 800 year old man crammed two of every species into a giant wooden boat when the entire planet flooded, an event for which there is absolutely no geological evidence whatsoever and also makes no fucking sense at all.

25.) Because I don’t realize that saying “microevolution is possible but macroevolution isn’t” is as stupid as saying “I can pick my nose for one second but I cannot pick it for 10 seconds.”

31.) Because I’m too stupid to realize that Social Darwinism has nothing to do with evolution and is actually a pseudo-scientific bastardization that real science largely rejects.

34.) Because plenty of respectable people like Ron Paul, Mitt Romney, and Mike Huckabee (who are not scientists) don’t accept evolution, and that somehow validates my opinion.